Oct
20
Yesterday I blogged here about Friend Request Manners. Well, not an hour later I get this message (see below) on Facebook. This is why you need to think & write, before you connect.
You will see that names removed for privacy. I wish I could loudly display names of those abusing the etiquette or have a judge make them use an ejector seat!
Do you remember a guy named XXXXXX??? I got a friend request from him and the only thing I can think of is that we MIGHT have worked with him at XXXX. His name is super familiar but I’m not sure from where. Of course, there was no pic on his profile and all his details were private. Let me know if if his name rings a bell. Love, Mary
Yes I am pretty sure he was ok. I say accept the request, out of curiosity! I need to add to my blog about people who don’t post PICTURES!
I’m gonna accept the request and if his full profile creeps me out I can always unfriend him really quickly, right? Or does that mean he still has access to my page after that? hmmmmm. Not sure now.
He has access to the page once you accept and until you unfriend him. Most pages people can generally see everything anyway unless you have specific privacy settings.(they can see but just cant post) Go to Settings and Privacy and take a look around.I choose to have most things open because this is social media (emphasis on social) but that’s me. You may want to adjust settings.
I received a friend request from someone in my line of work. I accepted even though he didn’t put a personal note. He made no communication with me whatsoever. No personal note, no communication after the accept, no wall posts on my wall, nothing. Okay, no biggie. I put him in the “Don’t Know” Friend List that I created.
I was in a group setting at a work function standing next to this very person and he never even introduced himself! A few weeks later I was cleaning up my Friends list and unfriended him. Not a week later this same person friend requested me again! This is not how Social Media works! Oh, hold on. Am I being stalked?
Great point about the Facebook Friend Lists. Facebook is not Twitter. But yet, even Twitter is a two-way street. That guy is missing out but hopefully he’ll catch on , better late than never. However first impressions mean alot and he may have lost some people forever. I have broken every etiquette rule in the book and learn as I go along.
Cara,
I’m glad you wrote about this, because I’m somewhat at odds with this whole thing right now. I’ve had an onslaught of random friend requests, probably 20 in the last week, all from people that I’ve never met. I group people into different functions and security allowances, but often wonder if I’m doing the right thing….Sigh. With the upcoming speaking event, I figure it’ll help us gain exposure, but where do you draw the line?
Mystery Friends Requests, do you get these? http://ow.ly/vu2u
Follow up to Friend Request Manners, Look what happened the very same day! http://ow.ly/vu3n
You know, it’s funny when I first started getting into social media, I figured I’d allow just about anyone to follow me (Unless they displayed themselves in a thong or something…then I’d block) But Facebook really was just for people I know or knew 20 years ago in high school. I’ve amended that rule a little bit to become friends with some of the people I attend a couple of webinar series in my field. We are in the same webinars and same business (Online Sales Consultants in New Homes) and it’s not a very common line of work and interesting to friend them. And I’ve also expanded to some networking locally, but usually I need to know of that person and know that we have several people in common that I respect…I think it’s all very personal how you decide to use facebook, and for that matter twitter and the rest. Great reminder though to introduce yourself. You may forget that even though your profile is pretty open for networking so people can check you out, that it’s still nice to say a quick hello.
Look what message I got the day I posted "Friend Request Manners" http://ow.ly/vu3O
hmmm…Leah,depends how good they looked in the thong to be my friend! LOL. You make a good point about how we often change our approach as we move through social media platforms. We can only learn from experience on what feels comfortable.
Jaylyn, I have thought of that, when I get a friend request, I think, is it someone who just heard me speak at Social Media Club VB? Someone I met at a meeting? and I almost feel bad that they don’t have a introductory message, and feel that FACEbook is about true Face to Face connections. (therefore introductions needed) and Twitter is for random connections. Now, for Fan Pages, thats ok anyone can connect automatically.Then again, I suppose its what each person is comfortable with. For Facebook, I believe in value of connections (not random) to have true engagement/small talk that leads to deepened relationships.
hmmm, I accept, add, follow, follow back, anyone and everyone. If some random person wants to spend all day on my facebook, so be it. If they really wanted to find me and learn more about me there’s creepier ways than perving someone’s fb page. I follow thousands on Twitter because it’s an incredibly powerful way to share. I’ve met and networked with some great folks and learned a lot of cool stuff. Good times!
do you receive mystery friend requests? http://ow.ly/UCHp
do you receive mystery friend requests? http://ow.ly/VSgv via @caramandart
do you receive mystery friend requests? http://ow.ly/VSg8